Alter Egos
by ecchansama
Summary: Ranma does his nightly rounds in the guise of his alter ego. Weird Oneshot I take no responsibility for.


Standard disclaimer (joke) goes here, probably referring to Takahashi as God incarnate or the like for writing Ranma, and let's not forget to mention that 'this lowly minion' is so broke they'd have to pay me if they tried to sue me, especially since I indirectly need to pay money to show the world this.

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Tonight, Ranma decided, was going to be a good night. Tonight the alter ego would be able to do his stuff without becoming HER alter ego. Ranma swore that the curse did it's best to activate at the worst time possible.

Ranma roof-hopped towards his goal, the ward of Juuban. No doubt would his friends be in trouble, as usual, before having a weird incident tip the scales in their favour. Be it a leaf hindering the sight for the opponent, a rogue car running the opponent over, a tennis ball hitting anyone in range for no apparent reason, or just a very (cough) intentional fall from a certain someone.

That certain somebody was destined to marry and have babies with Ranma's alter ego, but she was currently in love with someone else who she was certain was his alter ego. Weird. Hopefully it'll work out, without him, any of the 'hims', getting a mallet whooping.

Ranma slowed down as he felt his friends nearby and quietly changed into his alter ego, thankfully it didn't include giving everyone around him a free show, nor did it include lots of lights.

And today's monster was… dum dum DUM! … a water based one. Crap. Ah well, better throw the rose, sputter some useless and ignorant 'advice' and be off. Heck, he was running out of clichés to say.

He threw a rose at the monster, hoping to, just this once, hit the darn thing. Nope, a good seven feet off. Heh. The roses never hit home, unless it was a life or death situation.

"Fight on Senshi's of Love and Justice! The tides will always reverse!"

Seeing the girls change their eyes for oversized hearts Tuxedo Kamen decided to move back a bit. They might get the job done if he did this.

Sadly, for Tuxedo Kamen, the monster didn't like the interruption and promptly attacked, from range. The monster managed what Tuxedo Kamen had not, hit. The Senshi, seeing Kamen under attack went into hyper mode. Anyone that attacked their Tuxedo Kamen was going down, hard.

Ranma-chan, on her part, was fuming, not enough to heat the water though. It was, once again, time for Anything Goes, Remake. Less than a minute later Osaka Naru was lying on the ground looking slightly faint. This act was getting too easy, had to remember to call the real Naru later though. The toughest part was to trick the Mercury computer, tough but not impossible.

It was kinda fun how they had met the first time, Ranma-chan and Naru-chan. Ranma had been Tuxedo Kamen at the time, and had actually been fighting a little. It wouldn't last of course, as the youma had hit him square in the chest, sending him flying through a fence and into a nearby fountain. Naru had been watching her friends fight and watched in horror as Tuxedo Kamen took flight. When she walked over to help him up she met another redhead. They had both talked it over that night. Apparently Naru knew very well who the others were, and the last piece of madness didn't faze her. They had decided to keep Ranma's both secrets just that, secret. Naru had been around many youma before and told Ranma to call in case it was needed, or, if it was really late, send an SMS.

The reason for staying behind? Teasing the Senshi, what else? Both Ranma and Naru loved teasing the Senshi if they could, or the untransformed versions.

As the youma died it was time to start acting. The Senshi checked up on the last set of victims and were unsurprised at seeing Naru amongst them.

"One would think you would learn not to end up in these things anymore." Mars started.

"Someone would have to make sure things work out, don't you agree?" 'Naru' continued. "And I'm not talking about you." 'Naru' winked to the others.

"Then what were you doing? Sleeping in?"

"Nah, heard you fight so I decided to rest for the night." Mercury smiled silently at Mars' frown. Moon giggled and Venus… was hitting up one of the victims.

"Heh, I guess you would do more good than Moon. Can't beat her in clumsiness, no matter how hard you try." Mars was gifted with a fast mouth, too bad it wasn't paired with an equally fast brain.

"Say WHAT?!"

"You're clumsy."

"Oh excuse me Miss 'hey-fire-works-on-water-youma'." Moon and Mars were at it hard from there on, much to the amusement of 'Naru' and Mercury.

"PERVERT!" – WHAM! –

Moon, Mars, Mercury and 'Naru' blinked, hard. 'Venus claiming a boy to be perverted?' were the thoughts of three of them. 'Akane got an apprentice?' was in the mind of the fourth.

Greetings were exchanged, with the hopes of not meeting under the same circumstances again. As the form of Naru retreated from view Mercury spoke up.

"If I didn't know better I'd say Naru was Tuxedo Kamen. I think I need to repair the computer."

"If it was true… would that mean that Moon would bear the child she got with an other woman?"

Silence reigned.

"Venus, get a CAT scan."

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A/N; Want to continue it? Write it yourself. I got this weird idea a weird night due to the lack of everything, especially oxygen. Currently trying to find inspiration to write my actual story… Oh, forgot to mention that I'm not claiming to be Takeuchi either, as in; I didn't write Sailor Moon.


End file.
